![]() We are pretty sure that Will (Orlando Bloom) and Elizabeth (Keira Knightley) are having difficulties, that Cap’n Jack (Johnny Depp) is having hallucinations, and that Lord Beckett (Tom Hollander) is using Davy Jones’ (Bill Nighy) heart to control the seas and stamp out piracy. There’s much sailing to and fro something about a magical navigation chart, presumably to match Jack’s magical compass lots of crosses, double-crosses, triple-crosses and so-many-crosses-it’s-basically-a-porcupine and mini story arcs for even the most minor characters. The plot is – well, your guess is as good as ours. But while the pirates may still appear like lovable scamps in this third assault on world box-office records, the demands of this plot mean that they’re so concerned with keeping up the momentum that almost no time is devoted to actual, y’know, fun. For the most part, these pirates get up to little more than high jinks – picking a pocket or two, bar-brawling when the occasion presents itself – and haven’t been presented as real thieves or marauders since the supernaturally assisted attack on Port Royal in the first film. ![]() It’s a central irony in the Pirates movies that a profession most generally associated with scum, villainy and other unpleasantries is painted as a heroic career for free-spirits and the righteously rebellious. ![]()
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